no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
you scattered cereal all over the floor so you could "re-trace your steps and figure out what happened." 20 min later you yelled about the mess and let the dog in to clean it up. 5 min after that you screamed since the cereal was gone. you suspected me and locked me in the bathroom so i could "think about what i'd done"
and you bit everyone who tried to let me out. no more tequila for you. EVER.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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