Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Bring me that man meat
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Randomize
