I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
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