Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Randomize
