idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
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