Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Randomize
