i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize
