Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
