So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
is that a dick in a sweater?
Randomize
