all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
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