Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
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