I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
