better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
