DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
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