All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
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