new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
She's the barista slut.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize
