Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
