Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
It's just like the Real World with babies
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Randomize
