so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
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