So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
