i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
