I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Randomize