Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
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