At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
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