It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Randomize
