We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
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