I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
