I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
You took a bar mat shot.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
