I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
