I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
I'm both gender and math confused
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
