I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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