I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
