he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Randomize
