I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
