And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
So vagazzling was a success
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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