You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Randomize
