um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
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