Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Randomize
