3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
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