Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
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