I'll bet she douches with gravy.
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
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