Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
I just googled if crying burns calories
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Randomize