Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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