i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
