I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
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