fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Randomize
