I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Randomize
