you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Randomize
