YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Randomize
