he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
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