I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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