AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Randomize
