i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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